There was a time when I would allow myself to waste time; endless nights and what could have been happy moments with worry & anxiety. To be honest, in most every case, I was mourning not getting my way; not suffering from an impossible situation. I was being selfish in a big way. Before any of us allow ourselves to feel bad about a life circumstance; we need to check ourselves. It is unfair to those around us to have to listen to us complain and wallow in self pity.
Someone else is not a bad person because they disagree with us or don’t do what we want! We are being selfish to expect our wants and needs to supercede everything else in life. Lusting after material possessions, lustful feelings and above all selfish feelings can strangle our ability to act in a loving manner. Putting how you feel above how you treat others is a dangerous indulgence. We are all selfish in our hearts; but we can rise above it to be loving, kind, productive people. Personally I don’t have the time, nor will I compromise my beliefs so I can memorize everyone’s “don’t piss me off” rules; and skitter around anxiously trying to please everyone on their terms. I follow ten commandments and one true word; not selfish demands. Being kind doesn’t mean enabling selfishness or aiding in putting other people down.
Think before you allow your feelings to be hurt. If you are condemning a brother or sister; you can not rationally become angry when other people are not joining in to bash them. If your actions or words are unloving, they belong to you alone. I will not be expected to laugh at another person because putting them down makes you feel better about yourself. That doesn’t make me a jerk; and all I expect of you is that in the future you choose better actions; not that you are publicly punished for your missteps. I am imperfect and in the past I may have joined in childish discourse; but all I can do to repair that is to refrain going forward. True repentance means changing your behavior.
Keeping yourself distracted with self-destructive behavior will not improve your suffering. Shedding the self-serving ways of the world & returning to love will. We do not end the loneliness of being separated from good by doing bad; even if the world tells you YOLO & that it is too fun to give up. When our life doesn’t go the way we want it to we can come up with plans B,C,D, etc… but as long as those plans center around fulfilling our needs instead of living a good life, we will not be happy with the results.
It only sounds harsh and feels bad to give up the trappings of the world so long as you cling to it. The transformation from miserable, selfish, and alone to eternally loved, accepted, and owning the ability to solve all of your problems takes as long as you want it to. There is no secret way to unlock everything you want; and that is something you should never want. Find the one true path; it is filled with forgiveness, love, and peace of mind. Seek the truth; but be careful where you seek. Man-made rules, world traditions, and confusion mix together with the true word to make it appear overwhelming, condemning, and too tough to follow. I can think of no better way to spend my life than striving to be more loving, forgiving, and strong in my judgement. No one achieves this by improving on their Christmas decoration stash, buying fancier possessions, or holding down their brothers & sisters to “improve” upon their own situation. You can have nearly everything you want if you have high moral standards, loving goals, and guide your focus to true life improvements!